Big Meeting Scheduled

Monday morning, 7:50 a.m.

And I am petrified! I am meeting with both of Will's teachers, the school counselor, the school psychologist and an administrator. Yikes!

I have no idea what to expect and I am a bit worried because in a sense I am the one who called this meeting. I didn't really, but I am the one who sent the email to our counselor stating that I was going to pursue testing on my own this summer.

So, again, I am a little worried. Worried that we are all going to sit down together and they are all going to look at me and say, "OK- we are all here, now what? Why the heck do you think your kid has a problem?"

I spent yesterday afternoon gathering up examples of his work and assessments from this year, his report cards, his interim reports, his standardized testing scores and copies of the email to and from his teachers.

I am going to pour over those tonight and extract the things that raise red flags for me. I want to be prepared. I want to look like I know what I am talking about, even though I don't!

Actually, I am going to be completely honest and tell them that I have no idea if Will is a typical 3rd grader or not. They have brought things to my attention over the year, his grades have remained B's and C's, he continues to work inconsistently. Maybe that is typical. I have no idea, I have nothing to compare it to. No older siblings. Only my friend's children who all seem to be getting straight A's.

I'm not going to let him slip through the cracks. And I think that is exactly what would happen to him if I wasn't pursuing all this. He does not have BIG problems, but for some reason he is not excelling. And I do believe he is capable of that. If they can tell me my child is destined to be a B and C student I can accept that. But, I don't think that is the case.

I need to do a lot of praying between now and Monday morning. A lot of digging, a lot of thinking and a lot of note taking. I want to go in to that meeting with confidence.

Update

Not a lot to update. Just that I received an email back from the counselor last Friday. She said that she passed my question along to the school psychologist, as she is the one that handles the testing.

She also added that the school will not provide testing unless it is shown that Will has not been making academic progress. I have no idea what this means exactly.

He is definitely learning. I just think he learns differently. I think sometimes it takes him longer to learn something. I think he learns but sometimes has trouble translating what he has learned into answers on a test. Or rushes through his test or work and does not get the correct answer down.

I dunno. I get such mixed reactions from people about Will. Some friends think I absolutely should be getting him tested and that there must be problems going on here that we need to get to the bottom of.

My mom seems a bit more unsure like me. She thinks he needs tutoring and thinks that maybe there is something more there.

The teachers and school do not really seem concerned. They did earlier in the year and have made concessions/modifications for Will. That has definitely helped some. They don't think he is going to qualify for an IEP or anything if I have him tested.

Ack. I am waiting on that call or email from the school psychologist. This all seems to just move in slow motion... No one is in a rush, yet school will be out in 2 weeks. Hmpf!

Letter to the Counselor

Sort of like a 'Letter to the Editor'.

OK- maybe not.

Anyway, I just wanted to cut and paste the letter I just emailed to Will's counselor. I am done playing these head games with myself. I am making a decision, finally, and acting on it. Thus, this letter:

S,

I am definitely going to pursue having Will tested formally. His issues have certainly fluctuated this year and made it hard for me to know, at times, whether this is the route to take. But the issues always seem to come back and I think that is the bottom line. I worry that he is going to get to 4th grade and the same problems will keep cropping up and we will be no closer to solving his problems than we are right now.

He is not failing. But he is consistently getting B’s and C’s. That is fine with me if that is the best he can do, but I don’t think it is. I have a question for you. Do/Can most kids get straight A’s in 3rd grade? It seems like that must be more typical. 3rd grade is still “easy” and the teachers still provide a lot of guidance and help. I know that Lori and Molly have made modifications for Will in the classroom to help him, yet he still is not getting A’s. I can’t help but feel like there might be something underlying there. Only testing is going to provide that answer.

If we do the testing and nothing turns up then I know I have the problem of a child that really needs extra motivation, pushing and prodding and may not be a straight A student. At least I will know. But, if something does turn up then we can get to the root of what is going on and deal with it. His teachers from here on out could be made aware and hopefully he could be placed with teachers that would be accommodating to him. I think Will is in this fuzzy area between not having a “huge” problem and yet not being able to excel. I worry that those are the kids that fall between the cracks and I don’t want that to happen with Will.

So, what is my next step? Do I seek a private psychologist to do this testing? Do I have the testing done through the school system? I really have no idea which is the best route to go. I know it can be very expensive which is why it might be best to start with the school. But, it is the end of the year and that may not be an option at this point. Either way I plan to get it done so that I can have some answers before 4th grade.

Thanks so much for your help with this S!

Is every child capable of straight A's?

This is a question I have been asking myself this year. I asked a good friend of mine, a former teacher, this question the other day. She said that in 3rd grade, unequivocally, YES! She thinks all "typical" children are capable. Some may have to work considerably harder to get the A's, though.

So, why, then, is Will not able to do that? And why does it matter? Actually I don't think it does. Maybe I am caught up in the grade and I shouldn't be. Ultimately, mastery is what we want. We want Will to master what he is learning so that he can build on it. If he does not master 3rd grade skills it is going to be really hard to learn the 4th grade skills.

So, my question now becomes, how do I know if he has mastered these skills? A child that is getting straight A's is showing that he/she has mastered what they need to know. But, what about a child getting B's and C's? Does that mean he has not mastered the skills?

Not necessarily.

That is why I am at the point where I really want to push the testing. I am thinking I am going to contact Dr. M, who Chris and I met with about the bedwetting last year. We both liked him a lot and I think he does psychoeducational testing. I remember he had given us some sort of questionnaire to fill out and I did fill it out, but I never sent it back to him. If I recall correctly, when I filled it out it kind of raised some red flags for me, about Will.

So, I am going to get in touch with him next week and see what he has to say. See what he charges. All this stuff seems to be so very expensive. I found one psychologist online that does this testing and she charges $160/hour for testing (which is 4-6 hours), $160/hour for reviewing the test adn $160/hour for our follow-up meeting and planning session. Ugh. Easily $1000 right there. I may find Dr. M is the same thing and then I've got to figure some things out!

Summer is coming

Decisions need to be made, research needs to be done. I have determined that I want Will to be tutored this summer. The decision is between a tutoring program, like Huntington Learning Center or using a private tutor.

I now have a list of great tutors that charge an average of $35-40/hour. Yep, that's right. Man, I should become I tutor, I think. It's gotta be better than Real Estate right now!

Anyway, I need to get pricing on Huntington. But, I do think Huntington is going to be the way we go.

After consulting with my educational guru, a.k.a. my friend Tricia, I think he needs the diagnostic testing they provide. I think that will go a long way in determining if we have a real problem going on here or not. They can then tailor the tutoring to his needs.

If we go with a private tutor, they don't do the testing part. So how the heck do they know what he needs help on? Though, I was thinking of using a 4th grade Loveland teacher, and he/she would at least know what a typical 3rd grader would be capable of vs. what Will is doing. But... I think we have been chasing this idea of testing for too long now. It is time to act.

I feel frutrated with myself. We have been dealing with issues off and on since mid-December and I am still no further along then talking about what Will needs. Why have I not acted? Why have we not gotten testing done? Why am I beating this dead horse?

I guess because it has been a fluctuating problem. Good and bad. Sometimes things are just rolling along fantastically and then I find out the kid can't tell the difference between a noun and a verb. What? But then the next week he aces conjunctions. Really?

Ugh. Anyway, tutoring this summer, in one format or another, can only help. It might break the bank, but you know what? My kid's education and self esteem are worth it! You can't put a price on that. My husband thinks you can, but I am here to tell him you can't!